The Really Big List of Corny Jokes

100 Hundred corny jokes at a time. Please don't forget to share your corny jokes!

Q: What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer?
A: A father in law.

Corniness: 

Q: What kind of photos to teeth take?
A: Toothpics!

Corniness: 

I was going to tell a joke about fishing...
but I forgot the line.

Corniness: 

Jokes about air conditioners?

Not a fan.

Corniness: 

Q: When does a joke become a dad joke?
A: When the punchline becomes apparent.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?
A: A labracadabrador.

Corniness: 

Q: What's it called when a chameleon can't change its colors anymore?
A: A reptile dysfunction.

Corniness: 

Q: Why did the cross-eyed teacher get fired?
A: She couldn't control her pupils.

Corniness: 

I was wondering why my computer was getting so hot.

Turns out it needed to vent.

Corniness: 

Q: Where do the poor meatballs live?
A: The sphaghetto!

Corniness: 

Q: Why don't people like goats?
A: Because they think they are the greatest of all time.

Corniness: 

Déjà MOO - The feeling you've heard this BULL before.

Corniness: 

Q: What did the sweet potato wear to bed?
A: His pa-yam-as.

Corniness: 

Q: Where can you find chicken broth in bulk?
A: The stock market.

Corniness: 

As a wizard, I like turning things into glass.

I just wanted to make that clear.

Corniness: 

Q:What do you call a blind dinosaur?
A: Do-you-think-he-saurus

Corniness: 

Q: What is the difference between girl spaghetti and man spaghetti?
A: Meatballs.

Corniness: 

Q: Why did the mermaid start wearing seashells?
B: Because she out grew out of B-shells.

Corniness: 

Q: Did you hear the joke about the broken submarine?
A: It didn't go down well.

Corniness: 

Q: Why was the skiing spark plug in awe?
A: The view was shocking.

Corniness: 

Q: How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?
A: When it’s full.

Corniness: 

A red and a blue ship have just crashed together in the Caribbean. Apparently the survivors are marooned.

Corniness: 

Ban pre-shredded cheese.
Make America Grate Again.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you give a cannibal that shows up late to dinner?
A: A cold shoulder.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a police officer in bed?
A: An undercover cop!

Corniness: 

Q. What does a Mexican cow call his friends?
A. MOO-chacho

Corniness: 

If you dress up as a banana and eat a banana is that called canabananalism?

Corniness: 

Q: Why did the pizza maker run from the mafia?
A: He owed them a lot of dough!

Corniness: 

Q: How do you think the unthinkable?
A: With an Itheberg.

Corniness: 

Q: Why did the skeleton sleep in the snow last night?
A: He was a numbskull.

Corniness: 

Q. What is the difference between a dirty bus station and a shrimp with breast implants?
A. One is a crusty bus station, while the other is a busty crustacean.

Corniness: 

Q: How do you tell if a vampire is sick?
A: He is always coffin.

Corniness: 

Q: What streets do ghosts live on?
A: Dead Ends!

Corniness: 

Q: Why does the vampire always get picked last?
A: Because he sucks.

Corniness: 

Q: Where do fish sleep?
A: In a water bed!

Corniness: 

Q: What did the painting say to the wall?
A: I go you covered.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call the opposite of a hot pepper?
A: A little chili!

Corniness: 

Knock Knock
Whose there
Dishes
Dishes who
Dishes a bad joke

Corniness: 

Q: What is it called when Batman skips church?
A: Christian Bale!

Corniness: 

Q: Have you heard the Cookie Joke?
A: You wouldn't like it. It is pretty crumby!

Corniness: 

Q: Why was the sand wet?
A: The sea weed.

Corniness: 

Q: Why were you fined for reading Lord of the rings?
A: It was written by J.R.R Toll-kien.

Corniness: 

Q: Why is the sky so unhappy?
A: It has the blues.

Corniness: 

Q: Did you hear about the man who was on trial for feeding his cows dynamite?
A: The jury said it was A-BOMB-IN-A-BULL.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call it when a shoemaker drops his vegetables?
A: Corn on the cobbler!

Corniness: 

Q: What is the difference between a Hippo and a Zippo?
A: A Hippo is really heavy, but a Zippo is a little lighter!

Corniness: 

Q: Have you seen the movie Constipation?
A: No it has not come out yet.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you get when you decorate for Christmas?
A: Tinselitus!

Corniness: 

Q: Can a ninja throw a star?
A: Shur-he-can!

Corniness: 

Q: What's a comedian on a boat sing?
A: Joooke on the water!

Corniness: 

Q: What did one eye say to the other eye?
A: Something smells between us!

Corniness: 

Q:What do you call a mermaid on a roof?
A: Aerial

Corniness: 

Q: What's the longest word in the dictionary?
A: Smile! Because it has a mile in it!

Corniness: 

Did you hear Tom Brady is getting divorced?

His wife accused him of "cheating"!

Corniness: 

I feel sorry for shopping carts, they are always getting pushed around!

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a magic owl?
A: Hoodini!

Corniness: 

Q: How do asteroids get so big?
A: They take A-Steroid!

Corniness: 

Why don’t you ever see hippopotamus hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.

Corniness: 

Did you hear about the nun who quit? . . . she kicked her "Habit"!

Corniness: 

Q: What's white and can't climb a tree ?
A: A Fridge

A: What's green, brown and white and can't climb a tree ?
A: A Fridge in a combat jacket

Corniness: 

No more corny jokes please, you're gonna make me puma pants.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a bomb that doesn't explode, but lands on a cow?
A: A milk dud.

Corniness: 

Q: What is Dr. Jekyll when he is himself?
A: De-hyde-rated!

Corniness: 

You cannot run in a campground, you can only ran; because it is past tents!

Corniness: 

Q: What is the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed men on a bicycle?
A: Attire!

Corniness: 

Q: Why are movies stars so cool?
A: Because the have a lot of fans.

Corniness: 

Q: Why did the cow cross the road?
A: To get to the udder side.

Corniness: 

Q: A hot dog and a banana had a race, who won?
A: The wiener.

Corniness: 

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get soap in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a pretty ghost?
A: BOOtiful

Corniness: 

Q: How does a lawyer get where he is going?
A: He makes A-turn-ey!

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a singing Laptop?
A: A Dell

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call clumsy grapes?
A: Unconcordinated.

Corniness: 

Q: What is the moon's favorite gum?
A: Orbit.

Corniness: 

A pancake, a fried egg, and a strip of bacon walk into a bar. The barman looks up and says,"Sorry, we don't serve breakfast."

Corniness: 

Q: What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant?
A: Swimming trunks!

Corniness: 

Q. What are caterpillars afraid of?
A. Dogerpillars!

Corniness: 

Q: How do you flatten a ghost?
A: Use a spirit level.

Corniness: 

Q: Where does the electric cord go to shop?
A: The outlet mall.

Corniness: 

Q: Where did the cow take its date?
A: To the mooovies.

Corniness: 

Q: Where does the lion go to shop?
A: The MAUL!

Corniness: 

Q: What did they do with the cow that learned the whole Bible?
A: Put it out to Pastor!

Corniness: 

Q: What kind of shoes does an artist wear?
A: Sketchers.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a man that irons clothes?
A: Iron Man

Corniness: 

Q: How does the moon cut his hair?
A: Eclipses it!

Corniness: 

Q: Why do French people eat snails?
A: Because they don't like fast food.

Corniness: 

Q. What Crime did the tree commit?
A. Treeson.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a young locomotive?
A: A Trainee

Corniness: 

Q: Why did the fish get bad grades?
A: Because it was below sea level.

Corniness: 

Q: Why did all the kitchen staff survive the Titanic disaster?
A: Because Captain Smith watched everything but the kitchen sink.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you feed an invisible cat?
A. Evaporated Milk.

Corniness: 

Q: What does a philosophical dolphin think about?
A: What is my porpoise?

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
A: A waist of time.

Corniness: 

Q: Why could the bee not hear what people were saying?
A: He had wax in his ears.

Corniness: 

Q: What did one pair of jeans say to the other pair?
A: That's JEANius!

Corniness: 

I used to be addicted to soap,
but now I'm clean.

Corniness: 

Q: Why do guys play baseball?
A: To get to first base.

Corniness: 

Q: How do you keep a bull from charging?
A: By canceling its credit card.

Corniness: 

Q: What did the ear of corn say to Mr. frank?
A: We can be corny, dawg!

Corniness: 

Q: What did the first street say to the second street?
A: I'll meet you at the intersection.

Corniness: 

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